The New Cyber “Walk” – A Virtual Celebration of Strong Families

God created me to save the world or so I thought. Past experiences intertwined with my steadfast upbringing conditioned me to be tenacious. Likewise, the tiger spirit that burns within my soul lunges me into full attack mode when faced with a social ill. For me, it feels unnatural to stop unless the problem is not only resolved but also completely stamped out. Done. Vanquished. Exterminated. Committed to the history books as something that used to happen long ago. God created me this way and for a reason.

When He presented me with the vision for this Walk, He included all the extreme, adventurous elements that instantly ignited the pressure points surrounding the core of my being: blazing the trail by walking around the country, alone if needed; promoting the practices that can stamp out child abuse; and honoring families who survive or rebuild after setbacks and tragedy. I jumped in headfirst without a second thought. After all, I was created to save the world.

Yet, from the beginning, this Walk went in every direction other than the way it was presented to me in the vision. I finally realized that these first months of the campaign were about me translating the rhetoric of the Walk into action within the dynamics of my own family. I got that. However, I could not reconcile the conflicting emotions that arose as a by-product. Suddenly, I felt more strongly about establishing a home and a family of my own than I did about blazing the trail to save the world. Guilt washed over me day after day. How could I possibly put my own selfish desires before the work of God?

I prayed and I meditated. I meditated and I prayed. I asked God almost constantly about what He wanted me to do. “Do I resume this Walk or not? If you want me to, please speak up now while I still have the will to do it. If you don’t, I’m not going to do it. I don’t want to do it anymore.”

The guilt swelled even larger than before. How could I have possibly said that, even if only in my prayers? Nevertheless, the truth could not be denied, and those feelings grew more potent. I kept praying and meditating, meditating and praying. God did not answer me. Not a word, nary a whisper. I couldn’t believe it, but I was on a roll. There was no stopping now. The inevitable that I felt pinging within my soul for months found a heartbeat of its own. Without God telling me what to do, I publicly announced last week that I was “out of the save-the-world business.” I asked God to forgive me, still love me, and still guide me. But, “I am out,” I thought. I started planning my move to the city God led me to while planning this campaign. I was ready to go home.

Before starting this campaign, saving the world was my prime priority in life, second only to my Higher Power. Since God gave me that mission, then my logic considered it  as the absolute number one priority in life. Furthermore, my frame of reference for how life works dictates that a mission to save the world requires me to devote every ounce of time and energy to the cause. There’s no room for error, no room for downtime. Everything else in my personal life is secondary. Anything less would not honor my oath to do the will of God.

Once my love and devotion to my family started rising to the top however, it became impossible to pursue a save-the-world mission with the sacrifice and dedication that it takes. I came to understand that my devotion to God required me to be first devoted to family. Uh oh.

I cannot have two absolute, number priorities. It’s mathematically and emotionally impossible. In order to put family first, I would have to surrender to changing the world – no matter how small that may seem – rather than saving it. Herein lay my dilemma. A decision had to be made. God left me alone to make it on my own, governed only by the truth in my heart. He knew that I would have said yes to whatever He would have told me. But this time, He wanted to say yes to me.

The next day God came back to me and sat me down for a little chat. He reminded me of the first time that He spoke to me about my life purpose on this earth. He said that I would “change” the world, not “save” it. There is a difference. Knowing the difference alters the way that He wants me to approach the work that I do for Him from this point forward.

God created me to be a walking ball of tenacious of fire fueled by a tiger’s spirit. I can stamp out social ills on a much smaller scale and still have a worldwide impact. For instance, I spent the summer homeschooling my 6-year old nephew to prepare him for first grade. Watching his growing love for books and skyrocketing academic achievement in just a few short weeks has influenced my decision the most. Should he become the scientist who finds a cure for a terminal illness or invents a life-saving device, then putting family first will have “saved the world” after all!

Impact on the “Walk” Campaign

The “Walk” is a unique primary prevention campaign that can certainly continue without me actually walking the country. All infrastructure and systems are now in place to collect and feature family stories via our various online communities. We are interviewing and staffing volunteer Ambassadors now in preparation for an January 1, 2011 Relaunch.

Opportunity to Celebrate

My personal story throughout this journey has shed light on the need to find balance between work and family, prioritize career and family, reconcile spiritual devotion and family, and fulfill one’s obligations to life purpose and family. I dedicate the eventual success of this campaign to my family, and I thank them for showing me the way to that which is most important.

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